ssssh.......

silence is my faithful ally. i wallow in it in times of uncertainty and it favours me greatly. it cures and teaches my heart to be profound. speaks more of truth and it is more eloquent and powerful than speech. silence cleanses my sometimes over-stimulated mind. i find humility in silence and it never fails me. never cracks never breaks but fulfills its promise to steer me to the gate of peace.

boredom

when i'm bored i think i am tired of my surroundings but i am really tired of my thoughts. it is trite, repetitious, unobserved thinking that is producing the discontent. adopting a quiet awareness, a kind of listening attitude, usually freshens my mind and brings the situation i am in to life.      (echoing prather)

humility. . .

when gabby concepcion returned to manila years ago he was asked of his life experiences during his stay in the US. he said it's been very humbling to live and work in america. i seconded him on that because i felt the same way when i migrated in canada to build my life, family and career. i met the first face of humility in victoria university during my very crucial first day at work through welcoming handshakes and gestures from my colleagues who, until now, remains humble and grounded. it's a breath of fresh air to be around people who are not enamored of their position, power and ideas. the humble experiences i go through is the thing i would like to pass on to my children and to the people i meet everyday. i won't elaborate the virtue of humility here as i continue to be cognizant about it. in the real sense though, humility is the way to achieve wisdom, perseverance, blessing and successful relationships. we all reek with pride, and so "humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God." (1 Peter 5:6).

post birthday

along with avalanche of well-wishers, my special day was celebrated with somethng gold and bubbly,something sweet and creamy and something citrucy and healthy. by mid-day a wonderful, intangible gift was given to me. and i just couldn't believe that it did happen on my birthday!! :-)) the next day, the 20th remains a special and important day. it was neil's piano examination at the royal conservatory of music which we were so anxious and excited about. munchkins and i celebrated my day and neil's musical accomplishment. i love birthdays especially when it begins and ends in pretty notes.

agree, disagree

whenever i find myself arguing for something with great passion, i can be certain i'm not convinced. i find it almost impossible to make a strong declarative statement in conversation without feeling little nagging doubts and reservations. "i agree" and "i disagree" are impossible states of mind. no two people can think exactly alike or anthithetically. sometimes i say "i agree", because i want to avoid an encounter; sometimes i just want to get the other person to shut up. i usually say "i disagree," when i want to exhibit myself. there is an important difference between telling a person how i experience him and adding arguments to support the correctness of my view. my feelings about another do not require a case. i don't notice them deductively. (echoing h.p.)

(birthday 2012) - timeless. . .

 today! once more, i am breaking through the clouds in order to breathe life into the horizon. a bit woozy though to think that i am aging. i have now passed mid-life and honestly, i didn’t want to but the process is inevitable. whether i like it or not i will continually age every year. i pray that God will always include me in his plans. yet even if i added another year i have always felt timeless. with my munchkins around, i feel youthful and energetic and always rejoicing with what the world has been offering me. at this age, i could say that i have achieved the fulfillment i wanted in terms of my harmonious existence, the vast knowledge i have acquired, and my steadfast commitment to reach out and inspire others. when i needed peace, it has always been easy for me to acquire that. i am also blessed with people who loves me dearly. a wonderful job, a life, a love and my children.

today, i ponder, once more, my greatest dreams in excitement and at the same time with wistful sense of longing. it seems my dreams are just within reach, waiting for me to walk into them. i feel like what i desire. i also value the life i was given, building, dreaming, living with love, writing about love, treading the path of love, sharing, encouraging people and experiencing. i had a year of wonderful moments and  of course, share of trials and deprivations. as always, i had some lessons learned especially on my interaction with my daughters. as they grow, rearing them gets more complicated but every complications i surpassed makes me more committed and self-assured. when i look back as well, i also couldn't imagine my life without so many of you.

i continue to be in deep gratitude and appreciation for what i have and for what i continue to receive. i am also in gladness and in anticipation for the life i am going to lead in the coming months which, as always, an enthralling mystery to look forward to. thinking of what lies ahead gives me a sense of urgency to pursue every ounce of my dreams with an unstoppable passion.

i am pleased to have been showered with well wishes from family and friends all over the continent. my smile has been on steroids for the entire week! to everyone who remembered me, your good words and well wishes and efforts to reach me out have been taken so happily and have been treasured and remembered deeply in my heart.

yes! another year older, yet timeless. . .

not wrong, just misinformed

no one is wrong. at most someone is uninformed. if i think a man is wrong, either i am unaware of something or he is. so unless i want to play a superiority game i had best find out what he is looking at.

"you're wrong" means "i don't understand you" - i'm not seeing what you are seeing. but there is nothing wrong with you. you are simply not me and that's not wrong.

(echoing h.p.)

i choose to belive jesus walking in water. . .

there is so much going on around us today. storms, earthquake lurking here and there. fear and and frustrations threatening. i am a human being and I get scared. fear, worry is sort of crushing my spirit which i am trying to shake off. but I choose to believe in Jesus walking on the water. i choose to hear his voice as he commands the troubles to be calm and be still. i choose to trust. that is simply all I can do. i take God with me because i am helpless without him. dear God protect me, my daughters, my family, my friends, loved ones the entire world. calm our fears and take us to your safe embrace. amen!

live!!

play safe..yes, we feel secured with these words. but if you're not risking and trying something that goes beyond your whim, you deprive yourself from amazing experiences this world has. magic and miracles do surrounds us so live!! while you do, someone up there is going to live with you. ~bonette

keep hopes and dreams bright. . .

keep hopes and dreams bright. . .i'm sharing this thought with hopes that you will continue to hold on to whatever goals you have in life. there were moments perhaps when you feel you want to give up and to throw all of your dreams aside. i feel the same way, once in a while. i do my best though to steer my mind to this belief that every life story begins in a special, magical moment. every success begins from a turning point after which the situation completely transforms and all kinds of exciting possibilities begin to grow. as we never know when fate will strike or where it will lead us, what we need to do is to keep our hopes and dreams burning bright in our hearts until the day that fate launches us into a rousing new adventure.


continue to believe.....

accept your own truths. . .

trying days continue on. couple of minutes ago, i wallowed in silence in search of directions and answers to questions. a nagging question though came into my mind. what would it take for me to accept and consider my own truth? perhaps this could be your question and answer as well. that moment of quietness has been very significant to me. i needed that moment. . . . badly.

happy birthday mom!!

if i can be only half the parent you have been in my life, the lives of my children will be extremely lucky. i became what i am because of you who showered me with your wise advice and love. i love you so much mother and i am truly amazed at how you managed loving a lot of people all at the same time. here's a toast to you dear mother, a special and an important person in my life. wishing you a very Happy Birthday.

love and hugs, neil, cailean and me!

isang pagbati....

alleluia! alleluia! si kristo ay nabuhay muli para sa ating kaligtasan! nalulugod ang aming mga puso sa kanyang kabutihan at pangako. mula sa aming tatlo, pinaabot namin ang pagbati ng maligayang pasko ng pagkabuhay!! nawa'y punan ang inyong mga puso ng kaligayahan at katahimikan. :-)

on betrayal....

at this very moment there's this one word that keeps on creeping into my mind. it's the word BETRAYAL. judas iscariot's betrayal of jesus is of course very familiar to all of us and at the same time very troubling. indeed... it is very troubling. i know because i had been betrayed as well. and God knows how betrayal hurts so much from people who says love you. and i've been asking myself, who's going to betray me next?

semana santa. . .

mahal na araw, semana santa, banal na araw… anuman ang tawag natin hindi pa rin nagbabago ang tradisyon at obligasyon nating mga katoliko. isa na ang pag-ayuno sa mga bagay na nakakapagbigay saya sa ating katawan, pagtalikod sa mga bagay na materyal, sa gawang mababa at tiwali, taimtim at buong pusong pagdarasal, pangungumpisal, ang tapat na pagbibigay ng ating sarili at pagsuko sa kanya ng ating mga paghihirap para sa paghahanda sa misteryo ng hapis at ng tuwa. ginagawa natin ito upang maalala natin ang paghihirap ni hesukristo para sa ating mga kasalanan at maihikayat ang ating sarili sa buhay na malugod at ispirituwal. ibat iba ang pagunawa at pagpapahalaga natin sa okasyong ito gaya na rin ng pagkakaiba natin sa pagsunod sa kanyang mga utos at sa landas na ating tinatahak. sadyang tanging sarili lang natin ang maliwanag na makakasulyap sa totoong saloobin, sampalataya at pag aninag sa ating panginoon. ngunit sa ating puso at isip, nag-uumigting ang kagustuhang tahakin ang landas ng pagpapakabanal. maligayang pasko ng pagkabuhay sa inyong lahat!

i thrive in april

april has come and spring has started niggling my brain, making me excited about the plans i have. i always regard spring as a season of change and transition which I believe is true for both humans and nature. for nature, the transition is from a lifeless landscape to plants shooting off green buds from the branches and birds starting to chirp and flutter by. for us humans, we normally transform ...ourselves to a better person and we tend to make our perspective even larger. we correct our emotional spills and make ourselves stronger in facing adversities.

i was born on april and will be growing another year older in a few weeks time. and yet no matter how many april birthdays i celebrated, i remain to feel young. i guess the growth i see around and the brightness and vibrance of the season have always helped put myself in a positive and happy disposition in life. i like thriving in spring and i always wait for this season every year. the month is about the promise of spring fulfilled, but also the promise of things to come and has always been given a romantic image of showers and flowers typifying colours and births. it's all about brightness and cheerfulness around and being free because it promises outdoor activities with friends and families.

change and transition in my life will be constant as i breathe. every day is meant to coming into terms with my flaws and improve it and think as well what are the flaws i want to keep. it is springing up over and over again. as i always say, i remain growing... happy april everyone!!